March 06, 2014
RT Gets PWNED!
February 24, 2014
Everyone Wave Buy Bye To Piers Morgan
February 20, 2014
This IS the Droid We're Looking For!
Hat Tip: Thanks to the Redhead Obsessed Subculture Solidarity.
Oh My! Below the fold.
But remember this warning, they may be pretty but they have no soul.
February 13, 2014
Your Powahs are weak Master.
Caption Rusty's lament about no real light sabers yet ,his complete and utter inability to Use the Force and/or his homosexuality. Fatwas will be issued.
Update: No Fatwas! Grade: Incomplete....
January 30, 2014
Ministry of Jiggly: Olympic Edition
Should this not be an Olympic Winter Sport in Sochi 2014?
Make it happen Jawas.
January 29, 2014
NY1 Interview With Michael Grimm (R-NY) Goes Horribly Right
Staten Island Rep. Michael Grimm physically threatened NY1 political reporter Michael Scotto at the conclusion of an interview in the Capitol Rotunda following Tuesday night's State of the Union address.
Watch Michael Scotto’s report on the incident.
Grimm's threats came at the end of a brief interview in which he discussed the president's speech, calling the address "divisive."
Scotto then tried to ask the congressman about the ongoing federal investigation into his 2010 campaign fundraising:
"And just finally before we let you go, we haven't had a chance to talk about some of the..." Scotto began before Grimm cut him off.
That's the same thing Vinnie says to Rusty right before they um, you know, disappear into the bowels of the Sandcrawler.
January 27, 2014
Beyoncé's Labia Makes Grammy History
Papa don't preach, because when a woman's labia hangs out of her leather g-string it shows her empowerment.
Beyoncé's Grammy Awards performance was slammed by concerned parents on Sunday as they deemed the incredibly risqué routine too explicit for children to watch.Reminds me of that old joke, Two people meet inside Beyoncé's vagina.
The 32-year-old singer wore a revealing black thong bodysuit over fishnet tights to perform a rendition of her hit Drunk In Love alongside husband Jay Z at the Staples Center in downtown Los Angeles.
However Beyoncé's sexy dance routine, which aired at 8pm on both coasts and at 7pm central time, left many furious parents posting comments on social media that the performance was 'disrespectful' and entirely inappropriate for children to watch.
The second asks the first of he has a flashlight so they can find their way out.
The first guy replies, "If we had a flashlight, we'd find my keys and drive out of here!"
Update By request Beyoncé's natch moved below the fold.
January 06, 2014
Tom Hanks, Still Alive
December 17, 2013
He's Da Champ! (Update Fatwas Issued)
The sign language interpreter widely ridiculed for his performance at the Nelson Mandela memorial stands by his work.So he seems pretty confident? I wonder how he got into this line of charades?
Thamsanqa Jantjie said Thursday that he is a fully qualified interpreter and has been trusted in the past with other big events.
"It has been many years I have been doing this job" he told CNN. "My portfolio shows that I have been a champion of what I have been doing."
He said he had been drawn to the job of interpreting because he was disabled.See his interpretations are not wrong its just that everyone else's interpretations of his interpretations are wrong.
"I am suffering from schizophrenia, which is controllable. I am under treatment," Jantjie said.
Caption contest? I'm just dying to issue a Fatwa.
Update: Fatwas issued!
The Why U insult Holly Koran Fatwa issued against Kafiroon for...
Here's a little shout-out to my homies the Crips!The Devil Will Do Meetballs From Ur Body Fatwa Issued against Catseye for...
Inexplicably, during President Obama’s speech, Mr. Jantjie kept using the South African sign for “Bullsh!tAnd the Our Jihad Will Be Complete Once We Rape Your Women Fatwa issued against myself for...
You wanted the best, you got the best.
The hottest band in the world!
December 05, 2013
NY Councilwoman: "Knock-Out" Game Is Da Joos Fault
The Joos are just too successful. That makes blacks resentful, according to soon-to-be Councilwoman Laurie Cumbo:
CROWN HEIGHTS — The alleged "knockout" attacks on Jewish residents of Crown Heights may stem from ongoing racial tension between the neighborhood's black and Jewish communities, a newly-elected Brooklyn politician said.
Councilwoman-elect Laurie Cumbo, who was elected to represent Crown Heights starting in January, released an open letter Tuesday saying that many of her black constituents told her they feel threatened by the growth of the neighborhood's Jewish community -- and she fears the tension could be spiking the recent violence. [...]
"I respect and appreciate the Jewish community's family values and unity that has led to strong political, economic and cultural gains. While I personally regard this level of tenacity, I also recognize that for others, the accomplishments of the Jewish community triggers feelings of resentment, and a sense that Jewish success is not also their success."
There's that sense of unearned entitlement of an Obama supporter.
(Hat Tip: Gateway Pundit)
UPDATE: Apparently, there are some resentful young blacks at Yale University.
November 08, 2013
Then Rob Ford Started Jumping Up And Down Yelling KIll! Kill! Kill!
Well maybe "jumping up and down" isn't really a proper description when talking about the gravitationally challenged, but the rest is pretty accurate.
Um, Strong language in video
And also drugs are bad, Mkayy!
October 25, 2013
New Jawa Feature! Who's Behind it?
Also at this weeks Super Sekrit Zionist Planning Barbecue we'll be serving Palestinian Baby Back Ribs. Mmmmmm! Mmmm!
October 18, 2013
Its only appropriate that I link to the Daily Beast: for this story, no?
The husband of the 48-year-old woman who is now the most famous stenographer in America knew his wife had been getting up in the middle of the night for the past four weeks.
But he did not know why until after the Capitol Police had hustled her from the podium at the House of Representatives to a hospital for psychiatric observation.
Only then did Dianne Foster Reidy tell 54-year-old Dan Reidy that she had been repeatedly awakened by the Holy Spirit and urged to deliver a message on the House floor, where she has worked for the past eight years.
I queried Zionist Central for a statement and the response is as follows...
Shut up kid!So I'll be, you know, shutting up now.
October 05, 2013
Bikers Versus SUV (Updated: New Images Added)
Scroll down for update.
There is a lot of misinformation coming out about biker attack in New York last week, much of it from the media. (Click the links above if you don't know which I mean.) In this post I want to address the claim that Alexian Lien knocked a rider over and that the most seriously injured biker, Jay Mieses, was only stopping to help a fellow rider.
The original video is at the bottom of this post. After viewing each of the still frames below and reading my commentary, you will have a much better understanding about what is happening in the video and how some are misrepresenting the incident. You can click the image to enlarge in a new window.
At the start of the video, one thing you should note is that Lien's Range Rover is ahead of the motorcycles. Maybe not all of them, but ahead of the main group. This is important because many bikers are claiming Lien drove through their group from behind. They claim he was speeding and driving recklessly, which is why they wanted him to stop.
Here at the beginning, we see several bikers approaching Mr. Lien's Range Rover. One biker identified as Christopher Cruz pushes into Lien's lane. Lien allows him to enter in front of him.
Cruz accelerates widening the gap behind himself and Lien's SUV. Cruz looks back then applies his brakes. (You can see the brake light come on in the video, especially when in full screen.) The bike abruptly slows.
Lien is, no doubt, checking all the bikes now crowding around his vehicle. He brakes quickly, but not fast enough. The SUV apparently makes light contact with the bike's rear wheel. The entire time, Cruz is looking back at the SUV.
Cruz apparently doesn't know the SUV touched him. It is possible no contact was ever made! Cruz continues riding for a moment. Lien slows to a stop. The other bikers begin slowing down and looking back, and so does Cruz.
Now Cruz, reportedly injured with two broken legs, begins "walking" his bike back to the SUV. (That is, he remains straddling the bike while rolling backward using his feet to push.)
As Cruz makes his way back to the SUV, other bikers stop and begin dismounting their bikes. Jay Mieses is one of those bikers.
Cruz has reached the SUV. He gets off his bike and approaches the driver's side door. Mieses walks toward the SUV as well. His family is claiming he stopped to help an injured biker, but up until this point, no bikers have been injured and none are in need of help. Notice how many bikers are stopping around the SUV.
Note the time on this still frame, because when you watch the video, you can see Cruz take a swing at the door or the window of the SUV. (You may need to watch in full screen to see it.) Other bikers have surrounded the Range Rover. At least one tire has been slashed. Mieses is one of many in standing in front of the vehicle.
Feeling threatened and concerned about the safety of his family, Alexian Lien decides to flee the situation. Jay Mieses is run down and seriously wounded. He is not helping anyone, he is not offering aid to anyone, he is blocking Lien's SUV.
I hope these still frames make it a little easier to understand exactly what happened. There is a lot of misinformation out there, even by experienced journalists.
Many thanks to "AM" for emailing these stills from the video. This happens around 2:47 in the video. What you are seeing in the images below is the shredded remains of the SUV tire that was slashed during the initial confrontation.
The motorcycle rider recording the video seems to notice and gestures to the bikers behind him. (That's his gloved hand in the upper right of the second image.)
Click on the images to enlarge in a new window.
October 02, 2013
Biden Shows Press Classified Documents
I think the real story is that Joe Biden is allowed anywhere near classified documents...
September 22, 2013
A cartoon is included with the new game Grand Theft Auto V. It features the superhero Impotent Rage. Enjoy:
(Hat Tip: Gateway Pundit)
August 27, 2013
Russian Official: West Is Like A 'Monkey With Hand Grenade'
No one in the West could have gotten away with using this analogy without being branded a racist.
MOSCOW, August 27 (RIA Novosti) -- A firebrand Russian nationalist-turned-senior official said Tuesday that the West was acting in the Islamic world like a "monkey with a hand grenade." [...]
The United States may launch missile strikes against the embattled regime of Syrian President Bashar Assad as early as Thursday, NBC reported Tuesday.
Official Washington, as well as Britain, France and Turkey, is considering an attack on Assad's forces over allegations -- which Russia calls unproven -- that the Syrian government, locked in a fight against a domestic insurgency since 2011, used chemical weapons against civilians in rebel-controlled areas.
I couldn't find a video of a monkey with a hand grenade. But I found this:
Democratic Survival Kit: A Handgun, Brass Knuckles, And Voter Registration Card
He brought his voter registration, but I guess he left his race card at home this time (emphasis mine):
Jorge DelaPaz was arrested on charges of assault in the third degree of an elderly person, carrying a dangerous weapon, carrying a pistol without a permit, criminal posession of a pistol and interfering with police.
Police say on Sunday, the elder New Haven man was eating a hamburger in the Goffe Street Park following a Toni Harp mayoral campaign-sponsored event that afternoon when he was approached by DelaPaz. Police say DelaPaz told the elder white male that he shouldn’t be "in his park where young black kids are playing." When the man refused an order from DelaPaz to pick up a football, DelaPaz punched the man multiple times in the face, knocking him to the ground, police say. Several witnesses supported the victim's account of the unprovoked attack, police say.
Upon police arriving at the scene at around 3:40 p.m., DelaPaz fled the scene on foot. When he was apprehended, police say he resisted and injured the leg of a responding officer. Police detained DelaPaz and say they found a Sig Sauer P239 handgun, a set of brass knuckles and a voter registration card in his bookbag.
August 23, 2013
Chuck Gets the Cold Shoulder
Filed under Ministry of Snark.
August 20, 2013
Puffer Fish Builds A Bachelor Pad
Origins of the mysterious ocean "crop circles" solved.
August 13, 2013
Sandcrawler PSA: You Must Choose
In an exclusive interview by Newsbusted anchor Jodie Miller (see video below) we learn the reason for Obama's mistake. According to the POTUS the source of his faux pas was that he cannot see Mexico from his golf cartSave yourself, read Yid With Lid.
Please make sure you watch the video below because something bad always happens to the people who don't.
August 07, 2013
Can You Hear Me Now?
A Verizon worker had to call for help after being locked in an underground storage vault:
WESTBOROUGH (CBS) – Police say the owner of a Westborough storage facility took his anger out on a Verizon worker by locking him up.
Every second counted for Mike Hathaway who was sealed in an underground vault running out of air, and police say it was no accident. The victim was trapped when another man allegedly slammed the door. [...]
Hathaway called 911 from the vault and was eventually freed by a police officer.
Fortunately the signal was strong enough to call for help. No mention of what service the Verizon worker used. That lacking detail could be the obvious or it could be to avoid embarrassment.
July 23, 2013
World's Easiest Quiz
Or is it?
Questions below the fold. See how many you can answer correctly without looking up the answers.
- How long did the Hundred Years War last?
- Which country makes Panama hats?
- From which animal do we get catgut?
- In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
- What is a camel's hair brush made of?
- The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?
- What was King George VI's first name?
- What color is a purple finch?
- What country do Chinese gooseberries come from?
- How long did the Thirty Years War last?
- As I was going to St Ives
- I met a man with seven wives
- Every wife had seven sacks
- Every sack had seven cats
- Every cat had seven kittens
- Kittens, cats, sacks, and wives
- How many were going to St Ives?
I'm not providing the answers. You can easily look them up after taking the quiz. Just please don't spoil it for others in comments.
July 09, 2013
(insert snarky comment about Hip Hop here)
June 27, 2013
Ministry of Jiggly: Death Star Edition
Hat Tip: Rsluty.
June 20, 2013
James Gandolfini's Wounded Warrior Legacy
This is an older report, but it shows what a great person James Gandolfini was.
The documentary is on Youtube. You can view part 1 HERE. The other parts are in the sidebar by the video.
May 29, 2013
(Hat Tip: IHateTheMedia)
Rense.com asks "Is Obama Gay?"
I've used a few of their pictures here, but also included a couple of my own.
The first sign you might be gay, is your wife looks more manly than you do:
Another sign is if you throw like a girl:
Do you flaunt and giggle?
Do you sit "pretty"?
Do you like to snuggle close to male friends?
...and hold hands while gazing into each others' eyes?
Is your wrist limp?
Do you enjoy eating provocatively in public view?
These are all signs but are not conclusive.
Remember, gay or not, you are the best you you can be!
May 21, 2013
Kuffars Do It Naked
A Saudi woman has climbed a mountain after years of rigorous training:
A Saudi woman, Raha Muharraq, on Saturday reached the summit of Everest, the world's highest peak, in a first for the conservative Muslim kingdom where women's sports are severely restricted, her proud father said.
A naked Colorado woman climbed a mountain after a bad mushroom trip:
The college student, 21, had to be rescued yesterday afternoon off a Colorado mountain after she ingested mushrooms, stripped off her clothes, and scuffled with two classmates with whom she had been hiking.
I guess this goes to show, the real feat is not climbing a mountain. The real feat is getting off the mountain...
April 09, 2013
No Trespassing is enforced by Kim Jong Un, the current dictator, and his dog Chopper. The most feared and least seen dog in North Korea. Legend has it that Kim has trained Chopper not just to sic, but to sic specific parts of the human anatomy. Thus a spy who has illegally scaled the North Korean border fence might hear the dread cry: "Chopper, sic bawrs!!"
Also, at 1:00, a brief lesson on holding a handgun if you are one of those people who like to wave your hands around while you talk.
April 04, 2013
Boobies Against Islamists
BERLIN: Bare-breasted activists staged rallies in front of mosques and Tunisian embassies across Europe Thursday against what they called an Islamist crackdown on Arab women's rights.Probably NSFW in boobie fearing America.
A Femen activist burns a Salafist flag in front of the Great Mosque of Paris, on April 3, 2013.
"And we'll fight against them. And our boobs will be stronger than their stones."
The rallies targeted in particular the case of a Tunisian activist calling herself Amina Tyler who sparked a scandal last month when she posted pictures of herself online with the words "My body belongs to me" and "Fuck your morals" emblazoned across her naked breasts.
Why u insult holly banner of Islam?
More Fatwa seeking boobies below the fold.
April 01, 2013
An American Muslim calls a talk radio show:
Notice how the host of the show, Maria Milito, stumbles over herself to insist she is not "anti-Muslim" or "anti-Islam." The left has difficulties in rejecting intolerant views while at the same time, embracing the ideology that fosters those views. It's a fine line for them to walk, criticizing sharia without being "Islamophobic."
Transcript of the call below the fold, courtesy of Breitbart:
Host: Hi, Chris.
Chris: Hi. My opinion is something you’re not going to agree with.
Host: That’s okay.
Chris: I'm Muslim and I believe 110 percent in Sharia law. Sharia law needs to be implemented in the United States because that's the only way this deviant lifestyle will be corrected. You know what happens in Saudi Arabia and other Islamic countries to the gay people, correct?
Host: Mm-hmm. I don’t agree with it
Chris: They are beheaded, and that I believe --I'm going to fight as hard as I can with all of my brothers and sisters to make Sharia law in the United States.
Host: So people should be beheaded for being gay? I mean, c’mon, this is America!
Chris: This is a sin! No, you don’t like --you’re anti-Muslims?
Host: I’m not anti-Muslims, but—
Chris: You are anti-Muslims if you’re saying that about my religion.
Host: I didn’t say that. I’m saying about America.
Chris: About my religion? No. In America? We’re Americans too.
Host: You really believe people should be beheaded?
Chris: Yes, of course. Government should do that.
Host: So you have no friends that are gay, Chris?
Chris: No, I don’t.
Host: Okay, And if you did—
Chris: I don’t choose to associate with those people. No, no. That lifestyle is deviant, and it’s against Islam.
Host: That’s fine –
Chris: And sharia should come to the United States, obviously --
Host: --to feel that way but to believe that they should be beheaded is a little extreme, don’t you think?
Chris: --but you’re going to call the whole kingdom of Saudi Arabia extreme?
Host: I’m just saying beheading people for their sexual preference is extreme. Those are my words.
Chris: No, but you’re against Muslim countries then. You’re against Islam.
Host: I’m not against Islam. There are people who are Islam—Islamic in America
Chris: Do you know the law? Do you know sharia law?
Host: Do I? No, I was raised Catholic.
Chris: Maybe you should look into sharia and look into the countries that have sharia and what the penalty is for being gay.
She should also look into the countries that have sharia and how they treat women.
March 27, 2013
He get fired, again, over his artwork.
Ford is in major hot water over a leaked mock-up featuring the Kardashian sisters tied up and gagged in the trunk of a car with a winking Paris Hilton in the driver’s seat.Update: Bwahahahaaa! Maybe Kim Kardashian should ask her lawyer to file suit against herself? OMFG.
In response to the ad, the Kardashian family lawyer told E! News that the sisters “do not take this lightly and they are exploring all of their legal options” against those responsible.
March 18, 2013
LGF Wacko Kihnspiracy Theory of the Day
History Channel’s Satan Looks a Lot Like Barack Obama
I was ready to dismiss this story as an over-reaction: History Channel’s Satan Looks a Lot Like Barack Obama.WTF? If anyone he looks like a really really old Chris Rock playing Emperor Palpatine.
…until I read this: Hollywood Couple Created ‘The Bible’ Mini-Series to ‘Set the Record Straight’.
This must be due to Charles' being totally racist, because you know, they all look alike to him.
*Tsk, tsk tsk.
*You know you've totally lost it when even Jawas think you're a whacko.
March 14, 2013
Buzkashi Tragedy Averted
When the bomb went off the goat was destroyed, so they just used the governor.
In the end it was Ghanzi defeating Gardez 3 to 1.
March 10, 2013
He's practicing for "Dancing with the Stars"!
Lol, I like this guy! He doesn't care what anyone thinks, he going to enjoy himself. Kudos!
February 26, 2013
Remember How Grandpa Used To Walk 10 Miles Through Snow, Uphill Both Ways, Just To Get To And From Work?
Those times are here again.
Art Bouvier, the owner of a New Orleans-inspired restaurant located in Indianapolis saw a young man trudging through the early morning snow and ice last week. The teen stopped to ask Bouvier — who owns Papa Roux Po Boys and Cajun Food– how much further it might be to his final destination and was told it was six to seven miles.
“He thanked me and continued on,” Bouvier, who also goes by Papa, wrote of the encounter in a now viral Facebook post. “He could have asked me for money for a bus. In fact I quite expected him to. He didn’t. He just started walking.”
To a local news station, Fox 59, Bouvier added that the teen later said he wouldn’t have money for a bus ride until he got a job.
Bouvier continued in his post that 15 minutes later he was in the car and told his wife to pull over when he spotted the teen — still walking.
That’s when he found out the 18-year-old named Jhaqueil Reagan had intended to walk a full 10 miles for a job interview. The Bouviers gave Reagan a ride the rest of the distance — but that’s not all.
“I’m thinking to myself, here’s a kid walking almost 10 miles in the ice and slush and snow for the hope of a job at minimum wage,” Bouvier told Fox 59. “That’s the kind of story your parents used to tell, my parents used to tell, up both ways in the snow.”
Bouvier hired the kid. I don't blame him. That's the type of employee that makes any business a success, when the government isn't trying to kill it.
February 16, 2013
#Occupy LA Hearts Chris Dorner
Occupy Los Angeles has chosen to honor Chris Dorner in the wake of his death, despite the body count he apparently amassed. [...]
The statement of support and solidarity was posted on the Occupy Los Angeles’ official Facebook page Wednesday.
Chris Dorner definitely had the attitude and mentality of the #Occupy movement. Like #OWS protesters, Dorner had no respect for law or due process. Once he deemed someone guilty of a crime, he felt it his duty to exact punishment.
And it didn't have to be a literal crime committed for Dorner to take matters into his own hands. Just offending his PC sensitivities was enough. For example, in his manifesto he recounts two separate instances in which someone offended him with a slur, and in which he responded with his own brand of justice (emphasis mine):
I told Magana not to use that word again. I explained that it was a well known offensive word that should not be used by anyone. He replied, “I’ll say it when I want”. Officer Burdios, a friend of his, also stated that he would say nigger when he wanted. At that point I jumped over my front passenger seat and two other officers where I placed my hands around Burdios’ neck and squeezed. I stated to Burdios, “Don’t fucking say that”. At that point there was pushing and shoving and we were separated by several other officers. What I should have done, was put a Winchester Ranger SXT 9mm 147 grain bullet in his skull and Officer Magana’s skull.
The second instance in the manifesto happened when he was in high school:
A fellow student, Jim Armstrong if I can recall, called me a nigger on the playground. My response was swift and non-lethal. I struck him fast and hard with a punch an kick. He cried and reported it to a teacher. The teacher reported it to the principal. The principal swatted Jim for using a derogatory word toward me. He then for some unknown reason swatted me for striking Jim in response to him calling me a nigger.
In both these cases, Dorner reacted violently to a non-violent offense. Certain derogatory slurs are offensive to most people, but the mere utterance of such words are no excuse to respond with physical violence. Especially by someone who is supposed to be able to maintain emotional control in volatile situations.
Also, in both these cases, Dorner expressed anger and outrage that he, too, was held accountable for his behavior. Just like the #OWS movement, he expected praise and commendation for his actions, even though his actions violated common civility expected from decent people, much less from police officers.
Did Dorner have legitimate issues with the LAPD over circumstances surrounding his firing?
But taking matters into his own hands was not an option. Killing innocent people was not an option. His behavior only illustrates the LAPD was absolutely correct in one thing: Dorner was not suited to be a police officer. If his manifesto was an indicator of his mental state at the time of his firing, he should have been fired.
But to Dorner, as with the #Occupy movement, the end justifies the means. Even if the means undermines everything you achieve in the end.
January 22, 2013
You Can Have My Kittens When You Pry Them From My Cold Dead Arms
New Zealand environmentalists campaign to ban kittens:
Morgan called on his countrymen Tuesday to make their current cat their last in order to save the nation's unique bird species. He set up a website, called Cats To Go, depicting a tiny kitten with red devil's horns. The opening line: "That little ball of fluff you own is a natural born killer."
That little ball of fluff might be a "natural born killer," but it's MY natural born killer. Keep your paws off.