February 08, 2010

Always expect the unexpected.

February 02, 2010

The Juice, first sports illustrated, then the WORLD!!!!

Haaretz:

Israeli model Bar Refaeli appears on the cover of this year's Sport Illustrated calendar, which went on sale this week in the United States.

Refaeli is on the cover of both the table and wall versions of the calendar.

Refaeli achieved prominence in the international modeling world after appearing on the cover of last year's swimsuit edition. She will also appear in this year's swimsuit edition which hits newsstands on February 9th. The identity of the cover model is not yet known.

More below the fold.

click for larger.

Yup, clickable.

January 29, 2010

From time to time we like to give you the reader a nice peek behind the scenes here at Jawa Report.

Did you know Rusty can paint?

Also, did you know he's teh ghey?

Hat Tip: Vinnie ;)

January 26, 2010

aka L/Cpl Katrina Hodge as reported by Ghost of a Flea

A soldier who has served in Iraq has been officially crowned Miss England after the original winner relinquished the title last year to clear her name.

Hot bikini Video as well here at Ghost of a Flea.

January 16, 2010

OK that PJM email that just went out with the subject "Body Shots with Gisele" was like a total rip.

Jawa Report to the rescue!

Unfortunately Howie's Gisele library is on his other computer so this will just have to do for now.

January 12, 2010

All in one post? OMG!

Saturday night, downtown club Bordello temporarily transformed itself into Mos Eisley Cantina for a night of Tatooine-styled shenanigans helmed by Devil's Playground. Star Wars Burlesque reimagined a host of beloved characters from the film series -- from the sexy to the androgynous to the grotesque -- as scantily clad female performers

Update: Not quite safe for work video added below the fold.

January 10, 2010

What's up Chuck? Charles Johnson of Little Green Footballs is interviewed.

When anyone asked directly, Johnson said he would tell them he had voted Democratic most of his life -- including ballots for Bill Clinton and, in 2000, for Al Gore. Raised a Catholic, he now calls himself an atheist.

January 07, 2010

I'm not sure why the Akhi at al-Mosul are so upset with us? I mean ya do something nice for for your bros and this is the thanks we get?

Abu Hamza179:

Hey Pig you Are So fool Hill is Waite For you son of pigs Kuffars ur lieing rusty pig we love our death u lols now cant join our forum we block ur ips dandapeer our brother ansa you soon pigsssssssssss iam happyt then i kill pig inchaa Allah Ansar Al Mujahideen Hacking Group soon hack u pigggggggggggggggggggggggggg

Allahu Akkaber

Ibn Ubaadah "the beheader"

Go to hell! You Idiots! You Kuffar of Jawa....listen, 1 more attack on Al-Mosul Forum...and you will wish you didn't know whats internet...

I dunno either it was that or a FATWA?

:)

January 06, 2010

All your Imam Anwar al Awlakis are belong to us.

Go ahead join up, post some stuff. Keep it PG-13 please.

Hey peeps, I'm back. Yes, the tough tough life of an academic meathead. Can you believe we only get three weeks off for winter vacation? Help, I'm being repressed!

Now I only have this to deal with.

That should take, oh, say, the next two months! If you sent an important email over the past few weeks and I haven't responded, it might be a good idea to resend it. Sorry about that.

In the mean time, I was a guest on Rick Moran's radio show last night. If you have an hour to spare, why not listen to it. Let's face it, you were just going to waste that hour any way.

We discussed the security lapses leading to the failed Christmas airline bombing and recent developments in the world of terrorism. You might be surprised that I don't blame the security failures on President Obama's administration. Also appearing was Rich Baehr of The American Thinker.

You can listen to an archive of the show here.

December 31, 2009

May the new year bring us many Fatwas.

Updated and sticky: As a treat to our readers we thought it would be a nice gesture to fill you in on the kind of serious discussion that goes on behind the scenes here at Jawa Report. Here to take over is fellow Jawa and Yemen expert Sweet Jane Novak

In a shocking development, the residents of the Sandcrawler repeated the words "matt damon" several times, as they are prone to do, for no apparent reason

Update from Stable Hand:To female readers of Jawa....Happy New Year!!!!!!

December 30, 2009

Apparently YOU PEOPLE'S lust for boobies and hot good gay pron has finally driven Jawa Report over its bandwidth limit!

Oh well.

We apologize for the short outage and thanks to Pixi Misa for fisking it and yes of course there are boobies below the fold.

Why training in the arts of the Dark Side of course.

Image of the super sekrit Sith Lord training grounds below the fold.

Sure beats the hell of of that shithole Dagobah where the Jedi train eh?

December 29, 2009

Sarah Palin's daughter, her uterus, her baby, the other baby and baby daddy that I really didn't give a crap about.

Yoda to Andrew Sullivan on his Ghost Blogger turning to the Dark Side

I'm not sure why anyone else does either?

Might as well throw a, "John F. Kennedy was nekkid once with some hot chicks, until he wasn't", in there too for good measure.

December 24, 2009

Er uh yeah.

Jane and I decided, since we are the only two Jawas in the Sandcrawler today, that makes us boss and we say, "Screw it, its Christmas!"

Blogging will be light if at all.

December 23, 2009

December 22, 2009

And having an alter ego like this.

Is that I actually know Garfield. No shit he's a follower.

Seriously, he sent me this over that Twitter thingy.

Direct message from Garfield

Well maybe not as cool as I first thought. But hey.

December 21, 2009

Nothing more fun than feeding a data mining project bad data.

George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George SorosGeorge Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George SorosGeorge Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George SorosGeorge Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros.

We get a demerit every time we mention the above. We're going for a Fatwa! Or at the very least detention or something.

George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George SorosGeorge Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George SorosGeorge Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George SorosGeorge Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George SorosGeorge Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George SorosGeorge Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros George Soros

December 17, 2009

Remember how you thought you had it bad when you had to take four or five finals? Now imagine having to grade 200 of them. And no, I don't have any graduate assistants/slave monkeys to do the work for me.

Hence, no blogging.

And then next week I'm heading to L.A. so, again, my share of the blogging load is going to be light.

Lucky enough I have some great slave monkeys working here at the blog and they carry the brunt of the load. And all they ask in return for doing all the work I'm too lazy and/or busy to do is a single banana delivered bimonthly.

How sweet is that deal?

December 16, 2009

I reckon anyone can fish.

But to be really good at it I reckon you must also be unemployed.

There's a 99% chance that if you asked a pro fisherman what he did before he'd say, "I was unemployed".

Which means with the rate now at %10+ the fish need to look out.

For those who don't know. WTW stands for White Trash Wednesday.

December 15, 2009

Today we get this little postcard from one of our regular guests here who is serving overseas.

click for larger

May The Force be with him.

Update: I bumped this because I'd like for this Jawa regular to have all the well wishes we can get for him when he finally gets to read this post.

We thank him for his service, pray for his family and his safe return to the good old US of A as soon as possible.

The weather is expected to suck, with continued suckage expected through about the middle of April.

That is all.

December 14, 2009

I didn't know Rlsuty could rap? And that he was cahoots with Obama girl?

Master? Come back to the dark side.

December 10, 2009

is shown here in this slide-show about Bra-Free Celebrities..

click for more nips!

Is it just me or does she seem cold?

POP QUIZ! What is the first rule of blogging?

December 09, 2009

If you see Greyrooster in the comments spouting racist remarks please bring them to my attention. Thank you.

I blog in my spare time so I don't really have the time to patrol the comments section. I've unsuccessfully banned Greyrooster a number of times to no avail, so pretty much just gave up on it. But I'm going to put more of an effort into it. At least, that's the plan.

UPDATE: Just to make this clear, I'm banning Greyrooster for racist remarks. And I don't mean "racist" in the CJ sense of the word. I mean actual despicable racism.

I use the ban button very sparingly. I allow all sort of dissent, bad language, opposing viewpoints, etc. But the longer I let racist remarks go unchecked the less interesting the comments section is becoming.

If Greyrooster wants to come back under another name and he drops the racism then he's welcome any time.

UPDATE: From Greyrooster's comment he left on this thread, but which won't appear now because he's banned:

Damn it. I'm a racist. I keep telling everyone that. What's the problem with being a racist. 90% of blacks are racists. What is the problem with a white man being a racist to. Unfair, Unfair, us racists demand equality. We should have equal time on NBC, CNN, ABC. Rev Wright gets his time. He's not only a racist but he hates AmericaKKK. Louis Farrakhan is a racist. He claims white men are devils. He gets his prime time TV exposure. Rusty is unfair to racists. Black muslims are racists yet Rusty doesn't ban them.

December 02, 2009

Because...

As Howie sez, don't mess with our sweet Jane....

Update by Howie, By comment request radical rocking live completely different Lou Reed version below the fold.

December 01, 2009

Ran by a very old and good friend of Jawa Report is linked below.

Counterculture Conservative HQ

Stop in and say Hi to Jesusland.

November 27, 2009

A group of right wing hackers has apparently penetrated the layers of security at AOSHQ. Revealing at last the true intentions of this Sorros funded false flag operation.

Ace to Inner_Circle

Re: Double posting

George Soros demands a certain schedule for my double-posting. It has to be me, specifically, per the terms of my contract. I will float the idea that LauraW might do it for a while, but he's not a fan of hers, as he was bitten by a seahorse as a child.

Please delete this email immediately.

But I'm sure they have some thing more important to report, like the increasing effect of gravity on Brittany Spears' Nipples maybe?

Some droids never know when to shut up.

click for more

Hat Tip: Fred.

November 25, 2009

I'm sitting in a tree stand waiting for an elusive deer to show up. It's payback time for my commuter car's front end.

I wonder, is this a blogosphere first?

Also, I grew up in LA so I don't have a whole lot of experience with this. Other than sitting here on my rear waiting, is there something more I'm supposed to do? Because, as it is, this isn't the most excitng thing I've ever done.

~iPhone

Update: Nada. I'll try again in the morning.

November 24, 2009

click for more

November 06, 2009

OK Shackleford fess up.

November 05, 2009

Friends,

My wife is doing so much better. Thank you very much for the thoughts and prayers. I have no logical explanation as to why I believe in the power of prayer, but I do. So, please keep those prayers coming!

Thanks,
Rusty

PS-My schedule for this week is pretty much to do the minimal necessary at work and on the blog. But if my wife continues to recover, then I should be back Monday.

UPDATE: I had a few minutes so I read through the comments and prayer wishes over at that last post. Thank you very much.

Oh, and Nussrah -- who wished that my wife would "die f*cking slowly" -- is in the Woodside neighborhood of Queens. You know, just in case you were wondering.

November 04, 2009

My wife had what I thought would be minor surgery yesterday. It went well and she's fully expected to recover, but I don't think I realized the extent to which this would effect her. I definitely did not expect that I'd have to pick her up off the ground after she passed out -- twice.

Doctors think she'll pull through with no problem, but if you're a person of faith then I would ask that you remember her and my family in your prayers.

Thanks,
Rusty

October 31, 2009

The Jawa Report: Enough pumpkin power to destroy an entire planet!

Thanks to Mrs. Vinnie.

October 25, 2009

Crossed one of my list this weekend, thanks to Rudy!

October 20, 2009

I'm not sure why this video seems to piss off people so much. but its veritable gold mine of nasty comments

deenualhaq : the american panders are murderers of children and women, the americans r the same as cummunist russians,cold blooded pigs and apes, cowards who r defeated by a small brave group of true muslims who vowed to defend their religion against the dirty infidels who came to stain our pure lands, the same group who defeated the USSR by small and light weapons

Elizabeth Hasselbeck for telling that story about her nipples. Even though she clearly stated that the nipple pic was only sent to her family, that didn't stop people from you know searching.

Boobies, a force more powerful than you can possibly imagine.