June 02, 2014

Sandcrawler PSA: Forecast Bowe Bergdahl Sh*itstorm Will... Oh Look! Boobies!

Forecast is for every single pundit to endlessly repeat a story that no matter how you slice it is a win win for the Taliban and a lose lose for US.

Although on the bright side it did result in this post.

HIGH SPEED SHIT STORMS ARE OCCURRING OR ARE FORECASTED TO OCCUR WITHIN 10NM OF TWITTER, FACEBOOK, AND ALL ASSOCIATED SOCIAL MEDIA. FORECASTED WINDS ARE FROM 230V290 AT 12-18 WITH GUSTS TO 23-27KT ISOLD 30KT. THE POTENTIAL FOR VISIBILITY REDUCED TO LESS THAN 5SM BUT GREATER THAN 3SM EXISTS DURING PERIODS OF BLOWING SHIT. TAKE PRECAUTIONS THAT WILL PERMIT ESTABLISHMENT OF AN APPROPRIATE STATE OF READINESS.
But seriously there was no way to resolve this in a manner where we saved any face.

Saving that we had executed the five high value prisoners in a timely fashion, they were war criminals and committed crimes against humanity but for some reason our army doesn't shoot people much anymore. Especially ones as deserving as the freed Talibs. Then we could have at least exchanged a low value idiot for some other low value idiots.

If we left him behind, we look bad. We recover him in a trade, we look bad. Save a rescue with a big pile of dead Taliban there was no win win for the US

So I get the criticism, but to me to there is no way to salvage the story other than to let it die. We're just talking up a loss, serving the Taliban's propaganda machine.

So my suggestion, whenever you get the urge to write about Bowe Bergdahl just think of these and repeat "Cool blue ocean. Cool blue ocean."

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Because this is the only propaganda victory we're going to get out of this one.

I don't know about you but at least I feel better now. Bowe who?

Update: Girl loses 100 lbs, still has great tits. Unpossible!

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By Howie at 01:43 PM | Comments |