November 28, 2012

At Last Sasquatch DNA Sequenced


Genetic testing confirms the legendary Bigfoot is a human relative that arose some 15,000 years ago at least according to a press release issued by a company called DNA Diagnostics detailing supposed work by a Texas veterinarian.

The release and alleged study by Melba S. Ketchum also suggests such cryptids had sex with modern human females that resulted in hairy homidid(sic) hybrids...

...For her study, Ketchum obtained three "whole nuclear genomes from purported Sasquatch samples. The genome sequencing shows that Sasquatch mtDNA is identical to modern Homo sapiens, but Sasquatch nuDNA is a novel, unknown hominin related to Homo sapiens and other primate species." (Mitochondrial DNA, or mtDNA, is the DNA that resides in the cell's energy-producing structures, and is typically passed down from mothers, while nuclear DNA, nuDNA, resides in the cells' nuclei and is passed down from both parents to offspring.)

With the help of the Sasquatch our new base will be established, then whatever we want on this planet will be ours.

By Howie at 08:42 AM | Comments |