November 09, 2009

Anti-Muslim backlash begins

Fresh satire from Sense of Events:

DES MOINES, IA--Upset by killings at Ft Hood, Texas, by a suspect believed to have been motivated by his Islamic faith, a Methodist minister pulled his car next to the car of a Muslim woman attempting to change a flat tire. The minister changed the tire while the Muslim woman made sure her first-grade Muslim child did not stray out into traffic.

The Council on American-Islamic Relations, CAIR, immediately demanded that the woman's husband beat her severely with a rod no thicker than his thumb for spending time in the company of a man to whom she was neither married nor related by blood. It is not known whether the husband has yet complied.

MONTGOMERY, ALA.--Southern Baptists of this deep South city, enraged that a Muslim had apparently shot more than three dozen people at Ft Hood, gathered boxes of Gideons New Testaments and walked through Muslin neighborhoods passing them out and inviting them to Christian worship come Sunday.

The imam of Montgomery's largest mosque has filed a complaint with state authorities demanding that the Baptist churches' tax-exempt status be revoked for engaging in political activities. "It is takfir for Muslims even to touch infidel books," he said, "so their gesture was extremely offensive to us. This incident just illustrates how hard Muslims have it in America."

HOPE, ARK.--After three known white supremacists were arrested while trying to set fire to the only mosque in the same town where Bill Clinton grew up, men of a local African Methodist Episcopal Church began patrolling the mosque's perimeter 24 hours per day.

The men are equipped with cell phones to call police and two-way radios to contact one another. AME Pastor Andrew Thomas said that no one would permit anything to happened to the mosque like happened to a few black churches in the 1950s.

"We don't know how long we'll walk these patrols," he said. "We have several men who served in the Army and Marines since Nine-Eleven who say that this is nothing compared to what they had to patrol in Iraq or Afghanistan."

Other local churches volunteered to bring hot food and drink to the AME men. "The Church of Christ has been very helpful," said Pastor Thomas.

"The only thing we have to be careful about is not to set foot on the mosque's actual campus," he continued. "The congregants here told us that would defile their mosque."

Will the madness ever stop??