September 26, 2006

Rusty Held Hostage: Ransom Demanded. Rusty dies if no cash!

Update: Bumped, just in case some of you missed me grovelling for money yesterday. Turns out, Jawa readers are way more generous than I thought! I was hoping for tree-fiddy, and instead we had an outpouring of generosity. Thank you!

Okay folks, it's time for the first official bleg for money. The unofficial bleg for money started over the weekend when I added a Paypal donation button and an Amazon honor system thingy to the left sidebar. Since I've added it precisely zero readers have given me money. Update: Thanks so much for the donations, a few of you rock, the following does not apply to you.

Do you know how much time I spend on this Jawa thing? A helluva lot, let me tell you!

So, how much is The Jawa Report worth to you? I know, why buy the cow when you're getting the milk for free and all that. But, come on, it's gotta be worth something.

And as I tell my students, there is a difference between a stated preference and a revealed preference. I know you say you love the Jawa, but I don't believe it. Prove it to me. We reveal how much we like something by how much we are willing to spend on it.

So, until I reach my personal goal of making one billion dollars from donations, I won't be back. I'm outta the game. Done. Kaput.

Too much? How about one million dollars?

A thousand?

I'd settle for $3.50, as long as it wasn't from Nessie dressed as a Girl Scout. That damn monster always trying to trick me.....

Anyway, it would be nice if I could at least take Mrs. Shackleford out for dinner from time to time.

So, gimme cash or else the blogger gets it. Really. If there is one thing I've learned from doing this Jawa thing is that people pay ransoms. They even express concerns over fictional hostages. Or when that hostage is a G.I. Joe doll.

As you know, there is no Rusty Shackleford. He's a fiction. Made up. And I just don't know if I have the time anymore to play Rusty Shackleford. I have a real job, and the crazy blog money just isn't rolling in like I had hoped it would.

So, if you really like Rusty's stuff, why not give him some cash? Too little cash, and we kill the character off. But with enough cash....gentlemen, we can make him stronger. Faster. He'd be the Six Million Dollar Man of the blogosphere!

I guess if we raise some money, but not enough to give Rusty those bionic arms he's always wanted, then maybe we'd have to go with a new ratings gimmick. Like marrying Rusty off to one of the minor characters on the blog. Let's say Oyster. Or Republican Jen. Or, maybe we'll go with the Cousin Oliver option. Now that would be some wild wacky stuff right there.

Anyway, you get the idea. Give me money. Now. It's a mitzvah.

Amazon Honor System

Click Here to Pay
Learn More

UPDATE: If you donate through Paypal you should have received a thank you e-mail from me. If you donate through Amazon, do me a favor and e-mail me to let me know it was you. Amazon donations are completely anonymous.

Thanks. Another bleg and an explanation below.

But seriously, I have some other business to take care of, so I won't be blogging for the next few weeks or however long it takes. That's the real explanation for Rusty's absence. Money or no, I'm sure I'll be back. It's never been about the money.

Wait, did I just say that? It's always been about the money. My lifelong dream has been to sellout!

In any event, here's the second bleg: if you are one of the Jawa Report authors, how about ramping it up a bit while I'm gone?

Remember The Jawa motto: quantity before quality! Or is it: there is no God but God, and Mohammed is his prophet? I always get those two mixed up.

So, I'll see y'all when this project gets finished. Or when I make, say, a thousand bucks in tips. Whichever comes first.

By Rusty Shackleford, Ph.D. at 03:29 PM | Comments |