August 01, 2005

Bolton or Iraq? As if you had to ask.

Bolton was appointed this morning. Immediately George Voinovich, Olympia Snowe, and Lincoln Chafee left the Republican Party, screaming and urinating uncontrollably, bawling about their grandchildren. Their switch surrendered control of the Senate to the Democrats, who promptly tore up the paperwork on all of Bush's judicial appointments and claimed "it'll take a couple years to find" the other copies. Then they passed a resolution condemning the Iraq War and calling for US diplomats to enter into a Native American drumming circle ritual with the leaders of terrorist-sponsoring nations in order to "heal the rifts between our cultures".

Oh, wait, none of that happened and I'm just goosing Howie a little, as he often does to me when I go off on my pet issue. Actually, the people sweating and bawling over the Bolton appointment today are Howard Dean, Kofi Annan, Dominique de Villepin, and especially Kim Jong Il, who thought he was finally done with this guy but just keeps showing up out of nowhere like Rutger Hauer in The Hitcher. Actually Kim Jong Il's not sweating since his scalp was replaced with a teflon polymer poofy hair-do.

This was the right thing to do on a personal level--Bush has a reputation for loyalty to his staff and he backed Bolton all the way. But he was backing him in the first place because it's sound policy-- we need a firm hand in steering the UN. Bolton's a great guy for this job and I'm glad Bush followed through.

He's also right for this job because in many ways, Bolton doesn't fit in with the neocon/pro-spreading-democracy tenor of much Bush's cabinet. I've heard Bolton described as a paleocon and he's certainly not a fan of excessive US entanglements nor of the advance of international law and the enthroning of international institutions. Except, of course, for the PSI (which he authored)and the Illicit Activities Initiative. Which is why he's uniquely suited to this position--busting the chops of a ridiculously corrupt and self-important institution that thinks itself the Universal and Apostolic Church of the Secular World.

UPDATE: Chris Dodd's (D-Spazz) caught in mid-angry-jowl-flap over at the Corner.