October 14, 2004

Lucas, I am your father!

Who's your daddy George? You biyatch.

On a related note Jeff Quinton pisses me off this morning with this post: After initially indicating there might be a Star Wars-themed television show in the future, George Lucas has backed off reports that a Skywalker-centered television show was in development, according to T.V. Guide (can't find an article online yet to any report of this.)

Ok, so the first few seconds of the post I'm thinking, "Awesome, there's going to be a Star Wars TV show!! Something better than those lame-o shorts on Cartoon Network, I hope."

Then you get to the second part of the sentence, and I'm thinking, "What?!? I get all excited only to be told that Lucas is not going to do a Star Wars TV show!!!!"

Two immediate analogies come to mind:

1) Draft-gate. You know, a story about a non-story. "After 25 years Lucas still has no plans for TV show despite the buzz from Rep. Charles Rangel (D-NY) that with the present dearth in network programming production of the show was inevitable and, after all, weren't all these Sci Fi reruns and Buck Rogers remakes just a back-door way of making the Tatooine Chronicles a reality without letting the American viewing audience understand the full extent of the ratings war?"

2) "Can I come up to your room and use the bathroom." Then, it turns out she really has to use the bathroom. "Could there be a Star Wars themed TV show?" Come on into the room baby. Bathroom is right over there. Let me just slip into something more comfortable. Go on into the bathroom. That's right, make yourself at home. Viagra kicking in. Toilet flushing. Viagra working. Water running, wash up good baby. Anticipation. Come on out baby. I'm ready to go. "Star Wars themed movie? No. Thanks for the toilet. Toodles." Aaaaarrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

We have a name for a post like that: C*ck tease!!!

By Rusty Shackleford, Ph.D. at 09:59 AM | Comments |